Shopping Ferret

No Wonder God Loves Little Children! (more)

Dear God,
It rained for our whole vacation and is my father ever mad! He said some things about you that people are not supposed to say, but I hope you will not hurt him anyway.
Your friend (but I am not going to tell you who I am)

Dear God,
Please send me a pony. I never asked for anything before. You can look it up.
Bruce

Dear God,
If we come back as something, please don't let me be Jennifer Horton, because I hate her.
Denise

Dear God,
I think about you sometimes, even when I am not praying.
Elliott

Women's Rules For Men

1. We may be emotional beings, but do not lie to squirm your way out of trouble. We are not as gullible as you think.
2. Don't fix it if it's really not broke. You don't need to take everything apart out of curiosity.
3. Ask for directions!
4. "I don't feel like talking right now" is an acceptable thing to say. The unacceptable thing to do is sit there and pretend you're listening and just say "uh huh" and "yes, dear." It's condescending.
5. One remote is ENOUGH. No need to have a control tower in the living room.
6. Your way is not always the right way. Learn to say "I was wrong."
7. If we can't talk to you during a football game, then don't try to get our attention during a Lifetime movie.
8. If you say you are going to do something, then just do it. Don't sit around thinking of creative excuses why you couldn't get to it.
9. We are not your mothers, so don't expect us to clean up after you like one.
10. Wendy's chili is not considered a romantic dinner for two.
11. We understand that you have to put on a manly act in front of your friends. But in the privacy of your own home, it's okay if you just want to cuddle.

(To read "Men's Rules for Women" click here.)

Funny Friday: "Flamingo Wannabe"

What Are Cats and Dogs?

What are Cats?

1) Cats do what they want.
2) They rarely listen to you.
3) They're totally unpredictable.
4) They whine when they are not happy.
5) When you want to play, they want to be alone.
6) When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7) They expect you to cater to their every whim.
8) They're moody.
9) They leave hair everywhere.
10) They drive you nuts and cost you money.

Conclusion: They're tiny little women in fur coats.

What are Dogs?

1) Dogs lie around all day, sprawled on the most comfortable piece of furniture in the house.
2) They can hear a package of food opening half a block away, but don't hear you when you're in the same room.
3) They can look dumb and lovable all at the same time.
4) They growl when they are not happy.
5) When you want to play, they want to play.
6) When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7) They are great at begging.
8) They will love you forever if you rub their tummies.
9) They can never have enough toys and they leave them everywhere.
10) They do disgusting things with their mouths and then try to give you a kiss.

Conclusion: They're tiny little men in fur coats.

No Wonder God Loves Little Children!

Dear God,
I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Tuesday. That was cool!
Eugene

Dear God,
Did you mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident?
Norma

Dear God,
Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't you just keep the ones you have now?
Jane

Dear God,
Who draw's the lines around countries?
Nan

Wonders Wednesday Photo: Bumble Bee

Copyright © 2008 "DJ" author of Sonbeam Corner. All Rights Reserved.

Baby Polar Bear Keeping Cool

Sheep at Water Fountain

Overheard Prayer

A little boy was overheard praying:

"Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am."

Summer is Here!

Try to stay cool :)

Funny Friday: "Redneck Flashlight"

"Camp Granada" song lyrics

Hello Mudda, hello Fadda,
Here I am at Camp Granada.
Camp is very entertaining,
And they say we'll have some fun if it stops raining.

I went hiking with Joe Spivey;
He developed poison ivy.
You remember Leonard Skinner;
He got ptomaine poisoning last night after dinner.

All the counselors hate the waiters,
And the lake has alligators,
And the head coach wants no sissies,
So he reads to us from something called "Ulysses".

Now I don't want this should scare ya,
But my bunk mate has malaria.
You remember Jeffrey Hardy,
They're about to organize a searching party.

Take me home, oh Mudda, Fadda,
Take me home, I hate Granada!
Don't leave me in the forest where
I might get eaten by a bear.
Take me home, I promise I will not make noise,
Or mess the house with other boys.
Oh, please don't make me stay,
I've been here one whole day.

Dearest Father, darling Mother,
How's my precious little brother?
Let me come home if you miss me,
I would even let Aunt Bertha hug and kiss me.

Wait a minute, it stopped hailing,
Guys are swimming, gals are sailing.
Playing baseball, gee that's betta,
Mudda, Fadda, kindly disregard this letter!

Wonders Wednesday Photo: Pure White Lion

Words of Wisdom (funny)

1. I love deadlines. I especially love the swooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

2. Someday we'll look back on this and plow into a parked car.

3. Tell me what you need, and I'll tell you how to get along without it.

4. Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

5. Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn't there the first time you need him, chances are you won't be needing him again.

6. I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.

7. My reality check bounced.

8. On the keyboard of life, always keep one finger on the escape key.

9. Slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter!

10. Don't meddle in the affairs of dragons, cuz, like, you're crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

11. Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.

Unlikely Friends

Happy Father's Day!!!

Elk herd photo in honor of my Dad the rancher, sailor, carpenter, mountain climber, skiier, Boy Scout leader, hunter, fisherman, husband and DAD.

(1910-1987)

Copyright © 2008 "DJ" author of Sonbeam Corner. All Rights Reserved.

Cute Baby Possum

Funny Friday: To the 2008 Graduates...

Just kidding! :)

License Plates For Women

SO MANY MEN, SO FEW WHO CAN AFFORD ME.

COFFEE, CHOCOLATE, MEN ... SOME THINGS ARE JUST BETTER RICH.

DON'T TREAT ME ANY DIFFERENTLY THAN YOU WOULD THE QUEEN.

WARNING: I HAVE AN ATTITUDE AND I KNOW HOW TO USE IT.

OF COURSE I DON'T LOOK BUSY...I DID IT RIGHT THE FIRST TIME.

DO NOT START WITH ME. YOU WILL NOT WIN.

HOW CAN I MISS YOU IF YOU WON'T GO AWAY?

IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED, SLEEP IN THE KITCHEN.

Wonders Wednesday Photo: Double Tea Rose

Copyright © 2008 "DJ" author of Sonbeam Corner. All Rights Reserved.

Unusually shaped double tea rose in my garden.

Children Learn What They Live

If a child lives with criticism
He learns to condemn.

If a child lives with hostility
He learns to fight.

If a child lives with ridicule
He learns to be shy.

If a child lives with tolerance
He learns to be patient.

If a child lives with encouragement
He learns with confidence.

If a child lives with praise
He learns to appreciate.

If a child lives with fairness
He learns justice.

If a child lives with security
He learns to have faith.

If a child lives with approval
He learns to like himself.

If a child lives with acceptance and friendship
He learns to find love in the world.

Funny Dogs

Dear God...

Funny Friday: Late for Important Date

NOW THAT'S GOD!

It was one of the hottest days of the dry season. We had not seen rain in almost a month. The crops were dying. Cows had stopped giving milk. The creeks and streams were long gone back into the earth. It was a dry season that would bankrupt several farmers before it was through.

Every day, my husband and his brothers would go about the arduous process of trying to get water to the fields. Lately this process had involved taking a truck to the local water rendering plant and filling it up with water. But severe rationing had cut everyone off. If we didn’t see some rain soon, we would lose everything. It was on this day that I learned the true lesson of sharing and witnessed the only miracle I have seen with my own eyes. I was in the kitchen making lunch for my husband and his brothers when I saw my six-year-old son, Billy, walking toward the woods. He wasn't walking with the usual carefree abandon of a youth but with a serious purpose. I could only see his back. He was obviously walking with a great effort, trying to be as still as possible. Minutes after he disappeared into the woods, he came running out again, toward the house. I went back to making sandwiches; thinking that whatever task he had been doing was completed. Moments later, however, he was once again walking in that slow purposeful stride toward the woods. This activity went on for an hour: walking carefully to the woods, running back to the house.

Finally I couldn't take it any longer and I crept out of the house and followed him on his journey (being very careful not to be seen...as he was obviously doing important work and didn't need his Mommy checking up on him). He was cupping both hands in front of him as he walked, being very careful not to spill the water he held in them ... maybe two or three tablespoons were held in his tiny hands. I sneaked close as he went into the woods. Branches and thorns slapped his little face, but he did not try to avoid them. He had a much higher purpose. As I leaned in to spy on him, I saw the most amazing site.

Several large deer loomed in front of him. Billy walked right up to them. I almost screamed for him to get away. A huge buck with elaborate antlers was dangerously close. But the buck did not threaten him...he didn't even move as Billy knelt down. And I saw a tiny fawn lying on the ground; obviously suffering from dehydration and heat exhaustion, lift its head with great effort to lap up the water cupped in my beautiful boy's hand. When the water was gone, Billy jumped up to run back to the house and I hid behind a tree.

I followed him back to the house to a spigot to which we had shut off the water. Billy opened it all the way up and a small trickle began to creep out. He knelt there, letting the drip, drip slowly fill up his makeshift "cup," as the sun beat down on his little back. And it came clear to me: The trouble he had gotten into for playing with the hose the week before. The lecture he had received about the importance of not wasting water. The reason he didn't ask me to help him. It took almost twenty minutes for the drops to fill his hands. When he stood up and began the trek back, I was there in front of him.

His little eyes just filled with tears. "I'm not wasting," was all he said. As he began his walk, I joined him...with a small pot of water from the kitchen. I let him tend to the fawn. I stayed away. It was his job. I stood on the edge of the woods watching the most beautiful heart I have ever known working so hard to save another life. As the tears that rolled down my face began to hit the ground, other drops...and more drops...and more suddenly joined them. I looked up at the sky. It was as if God, himself, was weeping with pride.

Some will probably say that this was all just a huge coincidence. Those miracles don't really exist. That it was bound to rain sometime. And I can't argue with that... I'm not going to try. All I can say is that the rain that came that day saved our farm...just like the actions of one little boy saved another.

This was written to honor the memory of my beautiful Billy, who was taken from me much too soon, but not before showing me the true face of God, in a little, sunburned body.

*~THAT'S GOD ~

*Have you ever been just sitting there and all of a sudden you feel like doing something nice for someone you care for? THAT'S GOD! He speaks to you through the Holy Spirit.

Have you ever been down and out and nobody seems to be around for you to talk to?

THAT'S GOD! He wants you to speak to Him.

Have you ever been thinking about somebody that you haven't seen in a long time and then next thing you know you see them or receive a phone call from them? THAT'S GOD! There's no such thing as coincidence.

Have you ever received something wonderful that you didn't even ask for, like money in the mail, a debt that had mysteriously been cleared, or a coupon to a department store where you had just seen something you wanted, but couldn't afford.

THAT'S GOD! He knows the desires of your heart.

Have you ever been in a situation and you had no clue how it is going to get better, but now you look back on it? THAT'S GOD! He passes us through tribulation to see a brighter day.

Please pass this along and share the Power of God. In all that we do, we need to totally give HIM thanks and our blessings will continue to multiply.

NOW THAT'S GOD!!!!!!!!

Don't tell GOD how Big your storm is.

Tell the storm how Big your GOD is!

Wonders Wednesday Photo: Ocean's Power

Copyright © 2008 "DJ" author of Sonbeam Corner. All Rights Reserved.

Amazing Sidewalk Chalk Art!

Car Alarm

Kissed in church!